Afternoon tea is one of the most popular splurges for American visitors to the UK, but the ritual trips people up almost immediately. It's not just about posh surroundings and tiered stands of cake — there's a quiet code of conduct, and breaking it marks you out as a tourist before your first sandwich is gone. Here's what to know before you book a table at somewhere like Claridge's, The Ritz or Fortnum & Mason in London.

Dress up a little. The expected dress code is "smart casual" — think midi dresses or slacks for women, blazers for men — and athleisure will stand out for the wrong reasons. Some venues go further: The Ritz requires a more formal outfit, so check your venue's policy before you go. You don't need to look like royalty, just put-together.

Eat in the right order. The three-tier stand follows a bottom-up logic of sorts: savoury finger sandwiches first, then scones with jam and cream (closer to an American biscuit than a cake), and sweets last, from delicate cakes to seasonal tartlets. It's fine to eat with your hands, as long as you only touch what you plan to eat — leave the rest on the tray.

Milk goes in after the tea. It's an old debate, but etiquette experts including Eileen Donaghey and William Hanson agree: pour tea first, then milk, so you can adjust without watering your cup down. If you take sugar, use white — brown sugar should flavour, not change, the tea.

Keep the pinky down. Despite what movies suggest, raising your little finger is now seen as affected rather than refined. Hold the cup by pinching the handle with thumb and index finger at the top and fingers supporting underneath, and take small sips.

And don't stir in circles. Former royal butler Grant Harrold, who worked for King Charles III, says circular stirring risks sloshing tea over the sides. Instead, fold the tea gently back and forth — without clinking the spoon against the cup.

Why does it matter? Afternoon tea isn't cheap — you can easily spend a serious sum at a five-star hotel — so it makes sense to get the details right and enjoy it with confidence rather than anxiety. The good news is that none of this is hard: dress neatly, work from sandwiches to scones to sweets, and handle your cup with a light touch. If you want a rehearsal before crossing the Atlantic, the Drake Hotel in Chicago serves a historic afternoon tea of its own.

For travellers who love food culture and a bit of ceremony, this is one of the most memorable hours you can spend in London — and now you'll do it like a local.